Argument is everywhere. From the kitchen table to the
boardroom to the highest echelons of power, we all use argument to persuade,
investigate new ideas, and make collective decisions.
Unfortunately, we often fail to consider the ethics of
arguing. This makes it perilously easy to mistreat others — a critical concern
in personal relationships, workplace decision-making and political
deliberation.
The norms of argument
Everyone understands there are basic
norms we should
follow when arguing. Logic and commonsense dictate that, when deliberating with
others, we should be open to their views. We should listen carefully and try to
understand their reasoning. And while we can’t all be Socrates, we should do
our best to respond to their thoughts with clear, rational and relevant
arguments.
Since the time of Plato, these norms have
been defended on “epistemic”
grounds. This means the norms are valuable because they promote knowledge,
insight and self-understanding. What “critical
thinking” is to internal thought processes, these “norms of argument” are
to interpersonal discussion and deliberation.
Why ‘ethical’ arguing is important
In a recent
article, I contend that these norms of argument are also morally
important.
Sometimes this is obvious. For example, norms of argument
can overlap with commonsense ethical principles, like honesty. Deliberately
misrepresenting a person’s view is wrong because it involves knowingly saying
something false.
More importantly, but less obviously, being reasonable and
open-minded ensures we treat our partners in argument in a consensual and
reciprocal way. During arguments, people open themselves up to attaining
worthwhile benefits, like understanding and truth. If we don’t “play by the
rules”, we can frustrate this pursuit.
Worse, if we change their minds by misleading or bamboozling
them, this can amount to the serious wrongs of manipulation
or intimidation.
Instead, obeying the norms of argument shows respect for our
partners in argument as intelligent, rational individuals. It acknowledges they
can change their minds based on reason. This matters because rationality is an important part of
people’s humanity. Being “endowed with reason” is lauded in the Universal
Declaration of Human Rights to support its fundamental claim that
humans are born free and equal in dignity and rights.
Obeying the norms of argument also has good effects on our
character. Staying open-minded and genuinely considering contrary views helps
us learn more about our own beliefs. As philosopher John Stuart
Mill observed, He who knows only his own side of the case knows little
of that. This open-mindedness helps us combat the moral perils
of bias
and groupthink.
What’s more, the norms of argument aren’t just good for
individuals, they are also good for groups. They allow conflicts and collective
decisions to be approached in a respectful, inclusive way, rather than forcing
an agreement or escalating
the conflict.
Indeed, arguments can make collectives. Two
arguers, over time, can
collectively achieve a shared intellectual creation. As partners in
argument, they define terms, acknowledge areas of shared agreement, and
mutually explore each other’s reasons. They do something together.
All these moral stakes accord with our everyday experiences of arguing. Many of us have
enjoyed the sense of respect when our views have been welcomed, heard and
seriously considered. And all of us know what it feels like to have our ideas
dismissed, misrepresented or caricatured.
Why we have trouble arguing calmly
Unfortunately, being logical, reasonable and open-minded is
easier said than done. When we argue with others, their arguments will
inevitably call into question our beliefs, values, experience and competence.
These challenges are not easy to face calmly, especially if
the topic is one we care about. This is because we like to think of ourselves
as effective and
capable, rather than mistaken or misguided. We also care about our social
standing and like to project
confidence. And we might worry that acknowledging an opponent's valid points might betray our social identity, and let down our 'tribe'.
In addition, we suffer from confirmation bias, so
we actively avoid evidence that we are wrong.
Finally, we may have material stakes riding on the
argument’s outcome. After all, one of the main reasons we engage in argument is
to get our way. We want to convince others to do what we want and follow our
lead.
All this means that when someone challenges our convictions,
we are psychologically predisposed to hit back hard.
Worse still, our capacity to evaluate whether our opponents
are obeying the norms of argument is poor. All the psychological processes
mentioned above don’t just make it hard to argue calmly and reasonably. They
also trick us into mistakenly
thinking our opponents are being illogical, making us feel as if it’s them,
and not us, who’s failing to argue properly.
How should we navigate the moral complexity of arguing?
Arguing morally isn’t easy, but here are five tips to help:
- Avoid
thinking that when someone starts up an argument, they are mounting an
attack. To borrow Oscar Wilde,
there is only one thing in the world worse than being argued with, and
that is not being argued with. Reasoned argument
acknowledges a person’s rationality, and that their opinion matters.
- There
is always more going on in any argument than who wins and who loses. In
particular, the relationship between the two arguers can be at stake.
Often, the real prize is demonstrating respect, even as we disagree.
- Don’t
be too quick to judge your opponent’s standards of argument. There’s a
good chance you’ll succumb to “defensive
reasoning”, where you’ll use all your intelligence to find fault with
their views, instead of genuinely reflecting on what they are saying.
Instead, try and work with them to clarify their reasoning.
- Never
assume that others aren’t open to intelligent argument. History
is littered with examples of people genuinely changing their
minds, even in the most high stakes environments imaginable.
- It’s
possible for both sides to “lose” an argument. The recently
announced inquiry
into question time in Australian Parliament provides a telling example. Even
as the government and opposition strive to “win” during this daily show of
political theatre, the net effect of their appalling standards is that
everyone’s reputation suffers.
The upshot
There is a saying in applied ethics that the worst ethical
decisions you’ll ever make are the ones you don’t recognise as ethical
decisions.
So, when you find yourself in the thick of argument, do your
best to remember what’s morally at stake.
Otherwise, there’s a risk you might lose a lot more than you
win.
Notes
An earlier version of this article was published in The Conversation
as: ‘Actually,
it’s okay to disagree. Here are 5 ways we can argue better’. If readers are interested in following up the ideas here
in greater detail, the hyperlink in the above piece goes to the article (‘The
Ethics of Arguing’ Inquiry) homepage at Taylor & Francis Online. Unfortunately (for those without an academic institutional
affiliation), the article itself is behind a paywall. However, this
link will provide full access for the first fifty readers to use it. Please
feel free to do so!